Mom guilt, it’s like a disease. Is your guilt-o-meter making you feel like a bad mom?
When I was given the vision to start Merry Milestones I pushed aside the idea longer than I would like to admit. I told myself it was a very silly idea for someone like me to be an authority on any topics related to mommy-ing given most days I do not feel like a great one. In fact, on more days than not I feel like a bad mom.
These thoughts are typically a collection of things that I have mom guilt around…
Like holding up that “hold on” pointer finger while I finish off a text to a friend instead of watching my child do their latest stunt.
Or wanting to sit with my coffee in the morning instead of being covered with toddler books and starting a story book marathon first thing in the morning.
Or when I am enjoying some form of entertainment on the iPad and I don’t want to hand it over to my little ones for their ABC mouse time.
Or when I drop my little ones at the daycare gym and spend that extra 10 mins in the sauna after my workout instead of grabbing them up sooner.
Or better yet, when I go to the gym and fake working out just to have the break.
Or how about when we are all driving in the car and that song comes on that I am really feeling, but then my little one thinks this is a great time to interject with one of her really long stories with lots of pauses and I just don’t want to turn the music off.
Or when I put a stop to the world of imagination and discovery when I refuse to let my kids make a fort out of sheets and blankets in the living room because not only do I hate the way it looks in the center of my house, but I also know I’m going to have to take it down myself because they’ll “need help”.
Or when I’m feeling super lazy and do not want to get up to get my five-year-old a snack so I end up spouting off step-by-step instructions on how to take grapes from fridge, grab bowl from dishwasher, grab stool to wash said grapes off in sink, and enjoy.
Even as I write this, my 5 year old little girl is overhearing these words and she has said repeatedly over the last 15 minutes
“my mommy is the best mommy in the whole world”
and I assure you, your little one feels the same way about you, Mom. Even if they can’t communicate this with words, believe me they feel it. Embrace their next smile and fall into their next hug as these are small doses of the antidote to cure the mom guilt.
We are not bad moms. We are much harder on ourselves and our internal guilt-o-meter is calibrated to the finest degree. The smallest most insignificant thing will set it off.
So next time your guilt-o-meter starts going off because you’re trying to finish your dinner instead of running to the nursery to change that stinky diaper, know that your mom guilt-o-meter is a false representation of how great you are as a mother. I would even argue that with such a sensitive guilt-o-meter, you are an excellent mother! So drink that cup of coffee, finish your plate of food and take a moment for yourself because you are doing a great job and your little one thinks so too!